KERALA: No More The Land Of Women
Kerala used to be top in many aspects: education, human rights, women's rights, female literacy. But all this seems to be on a decline. Kerala previously used to be a matrilineal society but is alarmingly becoming patriarchal, with all its skewed views against women. Being a Malayali woman myself, I feel many of the ills in the state are brushed under the carpet, nowadays.
Many social workers consider education as the key to overcoming a lot of issues in India, especially when it comes to women's rights. Yes, there are some great perks being a Mallu woman. According to the 2011 Census, Kerala once again shined when it came to healthy gender ratio as there are 1084 women for 1000 men. This has shown an increase since the 2001 Census. Here, the birth of a girl child is celebrated and fathers pamper daughters more than sons. Both sons and daughters have equal right in the family property. Previously, only daughters had property rights which might come off as a shock to many non-Malayalis. All this point to Kerala being a safe haven for women.
But the crime statistics tell another story. Despite the healthy gender ratios and high education among women here, crimes against women are also on the rise. Education is not working as a liberating force for women, not in Kerala. According to International Centre for Research on Women and International Clinical Epidemiologist Network study (2000), Thiruvananthapuram (Kerala's Capital) ranks first among five cities in India in the prevalence of domestic violence against women. There has been a 300% increase in violence against women in Kerala which is very alarming. Maybe it is because women here register complaints against their abusers but still it is a worrying trend.
A matrilineal inheritance or "Marumakkathayam", also the matrilocal system in case of Nairs, was practised by the majority of Hindu communities as well as Muslims here till 1957. Many people in Kerala holds the view that Marumakkathayam was limited only to Nairs among Hindus but this is a faulty notion. Communities like Ezhavas, Thiyyas, Kshatriyas also practised this alongside Nairs. According to this tradition, the property is inherited solely through the daughters of a family and not through sons. The men of the family had the right to look after the properties but families needed daughters to exist. In Marumakkathyam, marriage was loose and was known by the term 'Sambandham' where women had the right to divorce or marry multiple times without any stigma attached to it. Accordingly, the husband would 'visit' the wife and sire children in her. But in such a system the husband never dared to mistreat the wife, in her own home. There were rare instances where the male heads/Karanavan (brother of the matriarch) acted like total dictators and stifled female voices but this remains a rarity. Such a tradition insured women held a high position in society as well as family. At the same time, the conditions of women in patriarchal communities such as Nampoothiri, Potties etc. were absolutely horrible. Until recently children used to take the surname of the mother and not the father, among matrilineal communities. But the Kerala government terming it as 'outdated' banned it. Yet not one feminist raised their voice against it, ie, the issue regarding why a child cannot take the surname of his/her mother!
It is alright to criticize the past but what the critics are forgetting is that they should spend some time to check the present as well. I am not saying Kerala's past was perfect but when one continuously criticize it, the present should have something positive about it. For women here, things are becoming hopeless by the day. The strange thing is no one is bothered about problems that women face in this supposed 'modern' times.
Moral policing is becoming a serious problem, nowadays. So is sexism, a lot of it from women themselves! There are a lot of sexists jokes circulated in the State, especially about wives of NRI's staying away from husbands. Mobile cameras are misused to crazy proportions, to abuse women. When I was small, women could safely bath in public ponds without any harassment or unwanted attention from men. But nowadays, such a scenario is unthinkable.
No woman can travel without fear in Kerala after six in the evening. If a woman is seen outside, even with the male company in late evenings, she is being seen a sex worker and prostitution is illegal in India. So one can imagine what the women here have to go through to prove that they are indeed a couple. I have always had a very protected upbringing so stuff like this was shocking news to me. But a couple of years back, I had gone out with my two brothers and some other family members. My brother and sister in law left me in the company of my cousin brother as they had some grocery shopping to do in the nearby mall. So I and my cousin waited for them on the roadside. As we were waiting, cars began to slow down seeing us. First, I didn't notice but when I heard my cousin swearing, I broke out of my reverie and saw that a group of guys had stopped their car in front of us and even went to the extent of opening the passenger seat door. So that I can get into it and go with them! My cousin literally screamed at them. He was absolutely shocked that the guys were audacious enough to do that despite me being in male company. All this happened not at late night but around eight in the evening! Ever since then I have wondered how horrible it could have got if I was alone there. Recently a female actor, Hima Shankar was detained by the cops as she was travelling with a male friend late at night. The cops abused her further as she was travelling with a boy at a night! Cops go moral, harass actor, pal This made me wonder whether I am living in literate Kerala or an ISIS dominated area! If this is the condition of the highly literate Kerala, how is the rest of India?
The terrible thing is some of the grossest sexist views are harboured by the so-called 'modern intellectuals'(read communists). Former Communist Chief Minister of Kerala, E. K. Nayanar, once said "rape in the US was as common as drinking a cup of tea" and that "why such a fuss was being made about the Suryanelli mass rape case since rape happens all the time." Suryanelli Rape Case Kerala communists are now using Marumakkathayam practices in the past to direct sexist abuses on Hindu women, particularly on Nair women, terming them as 'prostitutes'. The reason: their female ancestors had a form of marital relation known as Sambandham! Then again, the concept of chastity or shame is an Islamic or British import to Kerala which most of these intellectually bankrupt 'thinkers' here purposely forgets. My question to those who make such comments on past tradition would be this....today's generation believes in cohabitation and dating. Taking multiple sexual partners does not frown either. But why is it different when the previous generation of women did the same? Why are they being tagged as 'prostitutes'? The only difference is in the names, the practices are all the same. So does that mean any women who are not a virgin or has multiple sexual partners should be categorized as prostitutes! So one can imagine what Malayali women of today go through in Kerala.
Worst things happen in rest of India but that does not mean Kerala women also should undergo such horrible experiences. Hopefully, writers, feminists and political groups will use their brains for a change and react to issues that need to be addressed. If they spend half the time on issues women face today then we can have some hope. But currently, that is not the case.
There is no independent women's group to study women's' issues here. On the other hand, we have many countless politically backed organization which do nothing for the ordinary women. There are feminists groups that would rather bash Rama or Christ than to do anything useful for women. So my dear feminists and politicians, concentrate on right issues. Leave it to anthropologists and historians to study and comment about ancient societies.
2.23,853 cases of violence against women in Kerala in 2 years
3.Kiliroor sex scandal returns to haunt Kerala communists
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KERALA COSTUME OVER THE AGES |
Kerala used to be top in many aspects: education, human rights, women's rights, female literacy. But all this seems to be on a decline. Kerala previously used to be a matrilineal society but is alarmingly becoming patriarchal, with all its skewed views against women. Being a Malayali woman myself, I feel many of the ills in the state are brushed under the carpet, nowadays.
Many social workers consider education as the key to overcoming a lot of issues in India, especially when it comes to women's rights. Yes, there are some great perks being a Mallu woman. According to the 2011 Census, Kerala once again shined when it came to healthy gender ratio as there are 1084 women for 1000 men. This has shown an increase since the 2001 Census. Here, the birth of a girl child is celebrated and fathers pamper daughters more than sons. Both sons and daughters have equal right in the family property. Previously, only daughters had property rights which might come off as a shock to many non-Malayalis. All this point to Kerala being a safe haven for women.
But the crime statistics tell another story. Despite the healthy gender ratios and high education among women here, crimes against women are also on the rise. Education is not working as a liberating force for women, not in Kerala. According to International Centre for Research on Women and International Clinical Epidemiologist Network study (2000), Thiruvananthapuram (Kerala's Capital) ranks first among five cities in India in the prevalence of domestic violence against women. There has been a 300% increase in violence against women in Kerala which is very alarming. Maybe it is because women here register complaints against their abusers but still it is a worrying trend.
A matrilineal inheritance or "Marumakkathayam", also the matrilocal system in case of Nairs, was practised by the majority of Hindu communities as well as Muslims here till 1957. Many people in Kerala holds the view that Marumakkathayam was limited only to Nairs among Hindus but this is a faulty notion. Communities like Ezhavas, Thiyyas, Kshatriyas also practised this alongside Nairs. According to this tradition, the property is inherited solely through the daughters of a family and not through sons. The men of the family had the right to look after the properties but families needed daughters to exist. In Marumakkathyam, marriage was loose and was known by the term 'Sambandham' where women had the right to divorce or marry multiple times without any stigma attached to it. Accordingly, the husband would 'visit' the wife and sire children in her. But in such a system the husband never dared to mistreat the wife, in her own home. There were rare instances where the male heads/Karanavan (brother of the matriarch) acted like total dictators and stifled female voices but this remains a rarity. Such a tradition insured women held a high position in society as well as family. At the same time, the conditions of women in patriarchal communities such as Nampoothiri, Potties etc. were absolutely horrible. Until recently children used to take the surname of the mother and not the father, among matrilineal communities. But the Kerala government terming it as 'outdated' banned it. Yet not one feminist raised their voice against it, ie, the issue regarding why a child cannot take the surname of his/her mother!
It is alright to criticize the past but what the critics are forgetting is that they should spend some time to check the present as well. I am not saying Kerala's past was perfect but when one continuously criticize it, the present should have something positive about it. For women here, things are becoming hopeless by the day. The strange thing is no one is bothered about problems that women face in this supposed 'modern' times.
Moral policing is becoming a serious problem, nowadays. So is sexism, a lot of it from women themselves! There are a lot of sexists jokes circulated in the State, especially about wives of NRI's staying away from husbands. Mobile cameras are misused to crazy proportions, to abuse women. When I was small, women could safely bath in public ponds without any harassment or unwanted attention from men. But nowadays, such a scenario is unthinkable.
No woman can travel without fear in Kerala after six in the evening. If a woman is seen outside, even with the male company in late evenings, she is being seen a sex worker and prostitution is illegal in India. So one can imagine what the women here have to go through to prove that they are indeed a couple. I have always had a very protected upbringing so stuff like this was shocking news to me. But a couple of years back, I had gone out with my two brothers and some other family members. My brother and sister in law left me in the company of my cousin brother as they had some grocery shopping to do in the nearby mall. So I and my cousin waited for them on the roadside. As we were waiting, cars began to slow down seeing us. First, I didn't notice but when I heard my cousin swearing, I broke out of my reverie and saw that a group of guys had stopped their car in front of us and even went to the extent of opening the passenger seat door. So that I can get into it and go with them! My cousin literally screamed at them. He was absolutely shocked that the guys were audacious enough to do that despite me being in male company. All this happened not at late night but around eight in the evening! Ever since then I have wondered how horrible it could have got if I was alone there. Recently a female actor, Hima Shankar was detained by the cops as she was travelling with a male friend late at night. The cops abused her further as she was travelling with a boy at a night! Cops go moral, harass actor, pal This made me wonder whether I am living in literate Kerala or an ISIS dominated area! If this is the condition of the highly literate Kerala, how is the rest of India?
The terrible thing is some of the grossest sexist views are harboured by the so-called 'modern intellectuals'(read communists). Former Communist Chief Minister of Kerala, E. K. Nayanar, once said "rape in the US was as common as drinking a cup of tea" and that "why such a fuss was being made about the Suryanelli mass rape case since rape happens all the time." Suryanelli Rape Case Kerala communists are now using Marumakkathayam practices in the past to direct sexist abuses on Hindu women, particularly on Nair women, terming them as 'prostitutes'. The reason: their female ancestors had a form of marital relation known as Sambandham! Then again, the concept of chastity or shame is an Islamic or British import to Kerala which most of these intellectually bankrupt 'thinkers' here purposely forgets. My question to those who make such comments on past tradition would be this....today's generation believes in cohabitation and dating. Taking multiple sexual partners does not frown either. But why is it different when the previous generation of women did the same? Why are they being tagged as 'prostitutes'? The only difference is in the names, the practices are all the same. So does that mean any women who are not a virgin or has multiple sexual partners should be categorized as prostitutes! So one can imagine what Malayali women of today go through in Kerala.
Worst things happen in rest of India but that does not mean Kerala women also should undergo such horrible experiences. Hopefully, writers, feminists and political groups will use their brains for a change and react to issues that need to be addressed. If they spend half the time on issues women face today then we can have some hope. But currently, that is not the case.
There is no independent women's group to study women's' issues here. On the other hand, we have many countless politically backed organization which do nothing for the ordinary women. There are feminists groups that would rather bash Rama or Christ than to do anything useful for women. So my dear feminists and politicians, concentrate on right issues. Leave it to anthropologists and historians to study and comment about ancient societies.
References and credits:
1. Nair Sambandham2.23,853 cases of violence against women in Kerala in 2 years
3.Kiliroor sex scandal returns to haunt Kerala communists
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Constructive criticism is always appreciated. Thank you.